You know you're a chef when...

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Chefcallari
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You know you're a chef when...

Post by Chefcallari »

So I just recently discovered the "old forum" and found this thread... It was Awsome!
I was green lighted my mob boss Mark corleone so I'm restarting this super cool thread.
And home guys do not feel shy... Just because you graduated high school and choose not to deep fry your balls in anxiety and agro corn starch ... Doesn't mean you can't chime in.

So.....

You know your a chef when....

You will offer sexual favors to your heavy set dish washer to keep him from walking out on a Friday night...
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Kit Craft
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Kit Craft »

Chefcallari wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 8:45 pm So I just recently discovered the "old forum" and found this thread... It was Awsome!
I was green lighted my mob boss Mark corleone so I'm restarting this super cool thread.
And home guys do not feel shy... Just because you graduated high school and choose not to deep fry your balls in anxiety and agro corn starch ... Doesn't mean you can't chime in.

So.....

You know your a chef when....

You will offer sexual favors to your heavy set dish washer to keep him from walking out on a Friday night...
When you require a sous chef and a dishwasher to make mac n cheese at home for a three year old? My uncle always used to make such comparisons at family gatherings before he passed. He was a pro for more years than I have been alive and he carried that over in home kitchens across the family! Me, I wouldn't have a clue..
Chefcallari
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Chefcallari »

Kit Craft wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:00 pm
Chefcallari wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 8:45 pm So I just recently discovered the "old forum" and found this thread... It was Awsome!
I was green lighted my mob boss Mark corleone so I'm restarting this super cool thread.
And home guys do not feel shy... Just because you graduated high school and choose not to deep fry your balls in anxiety and agro corn starch ... Doesn't mean you can't chime in.

So.....

You know your a chef when....

You will offer sexual favors to your heavy set dish washer to keep him from walking out on a Friday night...
When you require a sous chef and a dishwasher to make mac n cheese at home for a three year old? My uncle always used to make such comparisons at family gatherings before he passed. He was a pro for more years than I have been alive and he carried that over in home kitchens across the family! Me, I wouldn't have a clue..
Hahaha... Your uncle was a lifer.... And from one lifer to another. I tip my hat and pour a shot in his honor.
cooknola
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by cooknola »

... industrial grade isn't good enough.
... when ya know what pajamas are.
... when you eat over a trash can at home.

I'm glad to see this thread. Too much fun.
-C-
Inhuman
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Inhuman »

you know you're a chef when :

-you hear your friends complain about their 9-5 and you just roll your eyes and think "those were the days"
-by noon you have consumed enough caffeine and nicotine to kill a desk jockey
-your first and last thought of the day is food related
-you spend more time with your crew than family/wife/ friends
-you spend all your free time looking at knives, thinking about knives , and sharpening knives.(ok this is most of us lol)
-you let the light new guy empty the hot water out of the coffee maker for 30 minutes before you tell him
-you say "heard" in normal conversation and people think you're weird
-you work 65+ a week on your feet with no breaks and as for more
-you actually enjoy grocery shopping (at least it's for me!)
- you prefer a simple home cooked meal prepared by someone else over a fancy restaurant
- you still feel satisfaction seeing the food flowing out of the kitchen
- you have absolutely destroyed a $50k+ day on the line
- you shower in cold water in the dark after above day 😂
- you can make a special out of on hand times in 10 minutes flat
- constantly quote movies and inside jokes with your crew
- always touch on at least 5 conversation topics a day that would be instant termination at any other line of work
- go home hungry after slinging $40 entrees all night

I could go on 😜
Chefcallari
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Chefcallari »

cooknola wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:05 pm ... industrial grade isn't good enough.
... when ya know what pajamas are.
... when you eat over a trash can at home.

I'm glad to see this thread. Too much fun.
On that topic.... EVERY THING in a pro kitchen is commercial grade... 1000 x stronger that what you have at home...........



.......EXCEPT GOD DAMN ALUMINIUM FOIL!
why oh why is the aluminum foil 1 micron thick???!!!
I've raised burrs thicker than Victoria aluminum foil!

I go home and grab renyolds wrap and I'm like
F#÷% me... Is this made of steel?!

Sorry.. Got carried away
Chefcallari
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Chefcallari »

Inhuman wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:12 pm you know you're a chef when :

-you hear your friends complain about their 9-5 and you just roll your eyes and think "those were the days"
-by noon you have consumed enough caffeine and nicotine to kill a desk jockey
-your first and last thought of the day is food related
-you spend more time with your crew than family/wife/ friends
-you spend all your free time looking at knives, thinking about knives , and sharpening knives.(ok this is most of us lol)
-you let the light new guy empty the hot water out of the coffee maker for 30 minutes before you tell him
-you say "heard" in normal conversation and people think you're weird
-you work 65+ a week on your feet with no breaks and as for more
-you actually enjoy grocery shopping (at least it's for me!)
- you prefer a simple home cooked meal prepared by someone else over a fancy restaurant
- you still feel satisfaction seeing the food flowing out of the kitchen
- you have absolutely destroyed a $50k+ day on the line
- you shower in cold water in the dark after above day 😂
- you can make a special out of on hand times in 10 minutes flat
- constantly quote movies and inside jokes with your crew
- always touch on at least 5 conversation topics a day that would be instant termination at any other line of work
- go home hungry after slinging $40 entrees all night

I could go on 😜

My man!

I never let the new guy know there's a water line on the coffee machine lol

I will also ask him to "remove the stale
Air out of the cooler" with a garbage bag

I type the word " herd" as a response to a text

I made 2 catering menus and a pop up menu off of-on hand shit today!

Let's keep this going chef!
Chefcallari
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Chefcallari »

cooknola wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:05 pm ... industrial grade isn't good enough.
... when ya know what pajamas are.
... when you eat over a trash can at home.

I'm glad to see this thread. Too much fun.
When you know who the f$%@! SANCHO is!!!
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Kit Craft
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Kit Craft »

Inhuman wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:12 pm you know you're a chef when :

-you hear your friends complain about their 9-5 and you just roll your eyes and think "those were the days"
-by noon you have consumed enough caffeine and nicotine to kill a desk jockey
-your first and last thought of the day is food related
-you spend more time with your crew than family/wife/ friends
-you spend all your free time looking at knives, thinking about knives , and sharpening knives.(ok this is most of us lol)
-you let the light new guy empty the hot water out of the coffee maker for 30 minutes before you tell him
-you say "heard" in normal conversation and people think you're weird
-you work 65+ a week on your feet with no breaks and as for more
-you actually enjoy grocery shopping (at least it's for me!)
- you prefer a simple home cooked meal prepared by someone else over a fancy restaurant
- you still feel satisfaction seeing the food flowing out of the kitchen
- you have absolutely destroyed a $50k+ day on the line
- you shower in cold water in the dark after above day 😂
- you can make a special out of on hand times in 10 minutes flat
- constantly quote movies and inside jokes with your crew
- always touch on at least 5 conversation topics a day that would be instant termination at any other line of work
- go home hungry after slinging $40 entrees all night

I could go on 😜
A lot of these cross over with working in a mill, which I did for years. That first one is the killer! I remember when 5 12's and a 10 was a light week. Launching a new product was always fun. You have got to love it when you get so much overtime that you actually start making less because of the taxes!
Gregory27
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Gregory27 »

I had the thought of becoming a cook when I was younger. Kitchen Confidential and Heat scared me away. Low pay, tough hours, demanding work environment, and sweating your nuts off on the line? No thanks, I'm perfectly content to be a good home cook and leave the professional work to the... well, professionals.
jmcnelly85
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by jmcnelly85 »

You don't enjoy meals at open kitchen restaurants because half the time you want to yell at that one guy just standing there not cooking or cleaning anything and the other half your trying to figure out what knives they're using.

Your wife doesn't enjoy meals at open kitchen restaurants because you keep making comments like, "man they keep their sally hot"
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Kit Craft
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Kit Craft »

Gregory27 wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:39 pm I had the thought of becoming a cook when I was younger. Kitchen Confidential and Heat scared me away. Low pay, tough hours, demanding work environment, and sweating your nuts off on the line? No thanks, I'm perfectly content to be a good home cook and leave the professional work to the... well, professionals.
Amen! Besides, I live in BFE so I would only be able to work at the local roach motel cooking whatever one finds under the mattress...I have worked in the kitchen in a few bars for a short period of time. I prefer my cooking to be at home where it is fun.
Chefspence
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Chefspence »

I've thought about this thread many times would liked to have seen it on this forum. I had some good ones on there I don't remember.

When no one wants to go out to eat with you cuz youre "too picky"
Lepus
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Lepus »

My favorite is the left handed saute pan. Gets 'em every time.
salemj
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by salemj »

Instead of [just] complementing your food people always ask you how you made something.
~Joe

Comments: I'm short, a home cook, prefer lighter, thinner blades, and own mostly Konosukes but have used over a dozen brands.
cooknola
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by cooknola »

Chefcallari wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:16 pm
cooknola wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:05 pm ... industrial grade isn't good enough.
... when ya know what pajamas are.
... when you eat over a trash can at home.

I'm glad to see this thread. Too much fun.
On that topic.... EVERY THING in a pro kitchen is commercial grade... 1000 x stronger that what you have at home...........



.......EXCEPT GOD DAMN ALUMINIUM FOIL!
why oh why is the aluminum foil 1 micron thick???!!!
I've raised burrs thicker than Victoria aluminum foil!

I go home and grab renyolds wrap and I'm like
F#÷% me... Is this made of steel?!

Sorry.. Got carried away

Well allow me to carry on...
HOW IN THE FUCK IS IT THIS HARD TO MAKE A STRAIGJT TEAR ON GODDAMN FOIL?! HEY REYNOLDS WRAP GO COMMERCIAL. I NEED THAT CUTTER!
-C-
cooknola
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by cooknola »

Chefspence wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 10:04 pm I've thought about this thread many times would liked to have seen it on this forum. I had some good ones on there I don't remember.

When no one wants to go out to eat with you cuz youre "too picky"

Especially the Wifey. She hates me when I ruined all her favorite childhood spots. Went to chilis tonight though. And honestly it was one of the most relaxing sit downs we've had in forever. The two year old sleeping on my shoulder the entire time however...
-C-
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STPepper9
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by STPepper9 »

When the new guy asks for some cornstarch to err... powder up, and you give him a bag of powdered sugar.
Oh wait, that was a server.
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STPepper9
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by STPepper9 »

Inhuman wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:12 pm - go home hungry after slinging $40 entrees all night
Every damn night.


Chefcallari wrote: Thu Sep 14, 2017 9:27 pm When you know who the f$%@! SANCHO is!!!
"As long as he doesn't touch my beer."
Chefcallari
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Re: You know your a chef when...

Post by Chefcallari »

Tell the culinary grad to

"Sift the molasses out of the brown sugar "
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